Jim Acosta Just Interviewed a Dead Kid. This Is Not Satire

You’re Not an Auditor — You’re a Joke

If you call yourself an “auditor,” I have bad news for you: you’re not brave, you’re not clever, and you’re not protecting anybody’s rights. You’re a clown with a camera who thinks yelling at cops is some kind of heroic act. It’s not. It’s pathetic.

The only people who cheer you on are the lowest-IQ liberals — the same ones who think shoplifting is activism and that burning down a Walgreens is “social justice.” That’s your audience. Congratulations. You’ve carved out a niche pandering to the dumbest crowd in America.

You’re Not Defending the Constitution

You love to scream about the First Amendment like you just discovered it yesterday. Here’s the reality: nobody’s free speech is being protected because you walked into a police station with a shaky iPhone and demanded a sergeant tell you what day it is. You’re not defending freedom — you’re annoying people who actually have real jobs.

You know who does defend the Constitution? Soldiers, cops who actually put their lives on the line, lawyers fighting in court, even journalists who dig up corruption. You’re not in that league. You’re not even in the parking lot. You’re just a guy with a GoPro and way too much free time.

You Don’t Help Anything

Let’s be clear: nothing changes because of your little “audits.” No police department suddenly reforms. No laws get overturned. No corruption gets exposed. The only thing that happens is you post another 15-minute tantrum online and hope the ad revenue pays for your next vape refill.

If you really cared about holding authority accountable, you’d join a watchdog group, work with lawyers, run for office, or at least attend city council meetings. But no — that would require effort, knowledge, and discipline. Instead, you just film yourself yelling “I KNOW MY RIGHTS” at a traffic cop.

You Look Weak, Not Strong

You think you look fearless, standing there with your camera pointed at some cop. What the rest of us see is a weak-bodied, weak-minded manchild who never got past high school debate class.

Real strength is building something. Protecting your family. Working a hard job. Contributing to society. What you do is none of those things. You’re not standing up to “the system.” You’re hiding behind your phone screen like every other weakling in your generation.

You Do It for Views, Not Liberty

If you really believed in your “mission,” you wouldn’t need YouTube super-chats and Patreon donations to fuel it. You’d do it because it matters. But of course, it doesn’t matter — and you know it.

So you slap “AUDIT” in all caps in your video titles and hope enough people click to keep you from having to get a real job. That’s not activism. That’s grifting. And it’s obvious to everyone except your gullible liberal fanbase.

You Make Real Patriots Look Bad

Here’s the worst part: your circus act makes people who do care about freedom look like fools by association. There are real patriots out there — people who actually read the Constitution, fight unjust laws, and respect the difference between liberty and chaos.

But when you parade around screaming at cops, you don’t make anyone freer. You just make freedom itself look like a joke. You’re a bad commercial for the very thing you pretend to defend.

The Ugly Truth

• A parasite on the internet, not a protector of liberty
• A nuisance to working people who don’t have time for your childish games
• A weak person trying to look strong by poking at authority
• A click-farmer chasing views and dollars, not justice

You don’t intimidate anyone. You don’t educate anyone. You don’t protect anyone. You just prove, again and again, that you are exactly what America doesn’t need: another useless loudmouth with a camera and no purpose.

The Challenge

If I’m wrong, prove it. Stop filming “gotcha” videos and start actually fixing something. Show us one law you overturned. Show us one crooked official you exposed. Show us one community that’s better because of your “audit.”

But you can’t. Because it doesn’t exist.

Until then, remember this: you’re not an auditor. You’re not a hero. You’re not even a watchdog. You’re just another pathetic attention-seeker who found a way to monetize being annoying.

And deep down, you know it.